Not a drum was heard, not a funeral note, As his corpse to the rampart we hurried; Not a soldier discharged his farewell shot O'er the grave where our hero we buried. from The Burial of Sir John Moore at Corunna by Charles Wolfe, 1791-1823 an Irish priest and poet. His career was cut short by death through consumption when he was only thirty-one years old.
What does the word Friendship mean to you, I wonder?
For me, Friendship means trust, loyalty, understand, someone who is there to support you whether it just with a word of encouragement during a difficult time, or to share in a positive moment. Friendships can be long standing or new, but within them are certain unspoken boundaries. Like No Hard Sell or Cold Calling.
Why am I asking this question?
Well, I think the word Friendship had been highjack, and abused on social media. I’ve recently had two people on two separate media accounts request my friendship. I hesitated over accepting them, but in the end I thought I can’t keep rejecting offers of friendship because who knows where it might lead.
What is my reason of hesitation?
Isn’t friendship a good thing?
It’s what comes next that disappoints me, but I’m getting use to it. The immediate hard sell. Whether it’s an author pushing me to buy their books, or a digital promoter offering me special cut-price services. What I find so fascinating is the fact these hard-sellers haven’t give it much thought. Before making contact with me you would’ve thought they might have googled my name, or a check of my profile to find out the relevant information. The author pushing their books would know I have my own to sell. The promoter would know I’m all over the place promoting my own books. And as many of them do, I’m busy promoting in the same places they’re offering, at a price, to promote my books.
Yes, I do check them out before accepting their Friendship, and have deleted rather a lot of requests over the years, if it is clear that they will be offering me services or Please, Buy-MY-Book Ads.
When I request a friendship on the internet, I don’t see it as somewhere else I can market my books. If I’m going to market my work I seek out places which are for writers and readers to either promote or buy books. Though these places can be a bit of a trap too if you’re not careful. I’ve been caught out twice. Someone offered to buy my book in exchange for me read their book, and giving them a honest review. That in itself is the first problem. a) they want a five stars review b) they don’t want to read your book or buy it c) they want you to buy theirs.
I’m a little too old fashioned, and honesty is a weakness of mine. a) I bought the book, b) photograph my kindle to prove it was on it c) read the book which was good, but not brilliant. It had quite a few issues and needed a good editing. d) I messaged them to explain I couldn’t give them a five star review because of the issues but I would give it a three stars. e) Not what they wanted to hear.
Never again. I’ve decided I will only market my books on marketing sites.
Here on my blog, you’ll see my book covers decorating the edge of the page, if you’re on a computer or laptop. If you’re on a phone or Ipad they will appear below the blog posts. By click on the covers of each book, you’ll be taken to an Amazon site in whichever country you’re in. This is the most promoting I will do to you. The choice is you, whether you buy or not.
I may share my book news with you, chat about book trailers I’ve made, and tell you news about new reviews I’ve had, but I hope you won’t see this as hard sell, or in your face promoting.
I will tell you about my books’ ratings, and about new books I’m writing which I hope you will find interesting. I will share another author’s chats and book launches with you. But I will never hard sell to you.
Thank you for your Friendship, and sharing my writing journey with me.
I value your thoughts, and please tell me if you have received requests of friendships only to find out it has been just a case of hard sell or cold calling.
Have a great weekend.